I have been desperately trying to become the wife and mother that I know God desires of me, since I have become a wife and mom. But, no matter how hard I try, I just can’t seem to make any lasting changes.I continue to be short tempered and fault finding with those around me, I try to change, but I just can’t seem to get it right.
Well, I am very happy to say that God is moving is great ways in my life and reveling many things to me through the Holy Spirit. Im not always the best at getting my point across, but let me attempt to share because God has blessed me so much!
God has given me a better understanding of the meaning of the word grace and it’s application in my life. I know that through grace we are saved and that through works we will never reach Heaven. It’s impossible to reach heaven through works, so God gives us grace and forgives our sins so that we may dwell with Him. But He has shown me that Grace is much more than just forgiveness and acceptance into heaven. Grace is an ever present help that He uses to meet us where we are at and then transform us.
We need God’s grace to transform our lives, we can’t do it alone! Now I know that I can’t change on my own, but somehow my prayers always seem to revolve around myself anyways. Example, “Lord, help ME to be kinder to my husband and give ME the strength to do Your will. I have faith that You will help ME to be kinder. Thank you Lord, Amen”
Now I know now that we really can do absolutely, ABSOULTELY Nothing ourselves and absolutely anything good in our lives is completely 100% Christ. Simple as that. Although I have been praying and asking God for help, I still have depending on MY faith that God would make ME be kinder. But I see that thinking is wrong. I have come to realize that God can’t make me kinder, but I can let God work His kindness though me with Grace. It’s not me being kind, it’s God’s grace and kindness in me and through me. Not me.
I also realize now that I was putting far to much faith in my faith. I thought simply having faith that God would change me, would change me. But that’s only half of it. Half is having faith that God can work through you and the other half is receiving that grace (Or God’s help to come and meet us where we are at and make the change within us) It’s through faith that I receive God’s grace to change me, not my faith will change me.
It’s like faith is the straw. We are at one end and God’s grace is at the other end. The straw itself can do nothing for us. It doesn’t matter how big or long that straw is, it by itself is just a empty straw. But once God’s grace comes through that straw, then we receive His help. It doesn’t matter how big OUR faith is, it’s a matter of accepting His grace through that straw. Once I started to realize that faith is simply a channel and not power itself, a bible verse came to mind that really hit me:
If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."
I used to think that verse meant that Faith is so powerful, that we need the tiniest bit and we can do great things for God, but now I see it differently. It’s the other way around. God is so powerful, that it doesn’t matter if we have the littlest faith of any human on the earth… we can move mountains with Him! We can’t move mountains with our faith, it’s our little bit of faith that let’s God do His thing and move those mountains!!!
I really hope this all makes sense, it is an amazing new revelation to me and the Holy Spirit has reveled to me how to pray. Since I have learned more about Grace, I know have prayed more like:
“Dear God, I know I am nothing and have no good in me, any goodness and strength is all You. That is why I humbly ask that You fill me with Your grace so I might shine of Your love. Dear Lord, I am asking in faith that You will give me the grace I need to show Your love.
Praying this way has transformed my life. For the last year I have beyond frustrated myself asking God to “change me” Now, I simply pray and humbly ask through the little faith that I have, that God’s grace would work in me. I challenge you to do the same and see what God does in your life. You, like me, will be amazed!